In Remembrance
by pickaxe881978
Summary: It's been two years since Freddie's friend Mike committed suicide. Today is the day that Mike's friends remember him and his friendship. This mostly focuses on Freddie.


**A/N:** **I decided to write this story as a way to help me cope with the loss of my very good friend two years ago. I also remembered hearing the saying about the biggest smile that I used in the story below. I felt that if I had heard that before that maybe I could have handled things differently and maybe just maybe my friend would still be alive today. Before my friend's suicide, I had not known anyone that was dealing with depression (at least not that I knew of). Now that I have had this horrible experience I tend to look a little deeper into people to see if they might be having problems of their own. Whether I can fix the problems or not, sometimes just being there and listening can be a great start. Reviews are always appreciated as is constructive criticism.**

Freddie Benson woke up on what to anybody else would have been just another regular day. Today was far from a normal day for him, however, because today marked the two-year anniversary of his friend Mike's suicide. This time of year always put Freddie into a funk after all he missed his friend terribly. The week or so leading up to the date of his suicide was extremely difficult for him. He has never been able to put the grim scene that he and Jack had the great misfortune to come across.

 **[Flashback]**

Pulling into the parking area near one of Mike's favorite nature spots they saw Mike's car parked by the head of the trail. They parked next to Mike's car and slowly walked over to the driver's side door. They both felt a mixture of relief and fear as they looked into the car and found that Mike was not there. Both men started down the trail calling their friends name as they went. The duo had only traveled about a hundred yards down the trail when Jack suddenly skidded to a stop. Freddie came to a stop beside him and looking at Jack "why did you stop?" Jack looked back at Freddie "I think I saw something" he said as he scanned the area again and found that he had indeed seen something. Jack took off running through the woods with Freddie close behind him. A few minutes later Jack stopped again as he came upon a sight he hoped he would not find. Freddie almost ran right into Jack and was about to ask why he had stopped but the sight that greeted Freddie's eyes answered the unspoken question. Freddie moved to his friend's side "Mike, NO!" he screamed as he checked for the pulse that he instinctively knew was not there. They were too late he had succeeded in taking his life both men were experiencing emotions from anger to sadness to all out confusion over their friend's death.

 **[End of Flashback]**

Even knowing everything he knows now Freddie still finds himself confused by Mike's actions on that day two years ago. Mike always had a smile and a kind word ready for anyone who may have needed it. He couldn't help but remember something that he had read after Mike's funeral " _Sometimes the brightest smiles hide the deepest secrets, the most beautiful eyes have cried the most tears and the kindest hearts have felt the most pain_." That particular saying had fit his friend exactly and in hindsight he wished that he had heard it before his friend's death so that maybe his friend might still be alive. Unfortunately, no one can turn back time so now Freddie, Jack, and several other coworkers are taking today off so they can visit Sara and then go to the cemetery to pay their respects to Mike. The six coworkers pulled into Sara's driveway got out of the van and made their way to the front door. Walking up to the front porch, they found a note taped to the front door. Freddie pulled the note off of the door and read it silently to himself first and then out loud to the others. "Hello Everyone, first I would like to thank you for taking time off to come and see me, your friendship has meant so much to me, especially over the last two years. Unfortunately, there was a family emergency that has come up and as such I will be unable to spend time with my extended family. I want you all to know that I love you all and appreciate all that you have done for me." While the others headed back to the van, Freddie added a quick note to Sara telling her that this was the least they could do in remembrance of their friend before placing the note back on the door. Heading back to the van he gets into the driver's seat and the group head to the cemetery to visit someone that should still be with them not dead and buried. The ride to the cemetery took about fifteen minutes from Sara's apartment and while they traveled everyone in the van shared stories about Mike. As they pulled into the cemetery, everyone in the van quieted down as a sign of respect not just for Mike but for all of the people interred there. Pulling into one of the parking spots Freddie shut off the engine and looked at his coworkers, no they were more than coworkers, they were friends just like Mike had been. "Before we visit Mike, I want to say something to all of you. I consider you all my friends and my friends should feel that they can talk to me about anything. We've already lost one friend because he did not feel like he could talk to us and do not want to lose another friend the way we lost Mike." Everyone in the van agreed and exited the van. They walked in silence to Mike's headstone with each person individually walking up to it and talking to their departed friend. Finally, it was Freddie's turn as he walked to the headstone the tears that he had successfully held back were now flowing down his cheeks. "Hey there Mike. I can't believe it's been two years already. You left us too soon Mike, we all miss you. We've all been trying to help Sara whenever she needs it. Damnit Mike why didn't you come to one of us, we would have done anything to help you especially if it would have kept you with us. Before, I forget Sam wanted me to tell you that she misses you as well and t-that we're having a baby. I will always remember all the good times we shared, goodbye my friend." Turning around he headed back towards the rest of the group who were waiting for him in the van, getting into the van he started it, pulled out of their spot and left to return to their homes and families knowing that their lives would still feel emptier without their friend. 


End file.
